| D
H Airlines a unique flying experience |
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our business: destinations planes pilots in-flight entertainment in-flight services in-flight meals terms and conditions on-line services: schedule forum facebook (mugtome) group communicate: contact us |
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| In
order to celebrate the launch of a new weekly service from the French colony
of Europa Island off the coast of Africa (population < 100) to the world's
leading city in inflatable animal shaped lilo technologies, Venice, DH is
offering a picture of Venice to the soul who guesses closest to his mass.
To enter, use your mouse / rat / hamster to click on the forum and head
to its Misc. section. Flights will begin in 2007, by which time you might
be able to book your ticket's online, in the meantime DH is contemplating
starting up DH Gondolas. IMPORTANT: increase in fuel prices have changed flight conditions ![]() It came to the attention of DH that he had paid more for the fuel for his laest flight thatn he usually does. Fuel is a significant cost for flights and consequently DH has decided to make some cut backs. From now on all air in the plane MUST be used at least 3 times, safety systems can opperate only during the 1st 30 seconds of the flight rather than the full 1st minute and ice lollies (popsicals) will be replaced with pomegranates. Custoemrs are also required to help ease the situation by bringing their own fuel to use to fly the plane and DH will be eating Tesco value baked beans from now on, so expect the quality of the in-flight meals to suffer as a direct result.... bryce nearly gets run over in airport horror |
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Recently, on a trip to DH's secret cash box back at Birmingham Airport (its hidden in the 4th dustbin from the west entrance, in a comparttment underneath marked: "Here Be Treasure"), Bryce, DH Airlines only real pilot, encountered a heat wave. This wave managed to knock the five pence piece he was carying to the box out of his mouth and into the coffee of a rich Czech businessman waiting to catch DH's next flight to Prague (delays expected). Bryce didn't know what to do. He reached out to tap the Czech gentleman on the shoulder to ask for 35% of DH Airlines profits back, but his foot was forced into his face by the whirlwind caused by an airport trolley that had just been sent down the escalator by DH himself.Bryce is lucky to be alive. DH said: "I was not trying to hit Bryce, I just wanted to see if the trolleys had any good wheels because my plane needs some new ones". Consequently Bryce now always wears sunglasses to access the safe. who
are you? important dh forum announcement |
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"listen
up all you loyal subjects of my minty and slightly strawberry flavoured
forum" says DH on a very productive day of flying people from one side
of London to the other. "Your community will be redesigned within the
next few months and will be accessible to all, including the gas repair
man and, more so than that, my co-pilot Bryce". If you want to have
your say on any DH topic please continue to use the DH forum as all posts
will be copied over to the new one. If you know any reason why the forum
can not be redesigned, you must declare so now. Please don't, however, post to tell DH that the keyboard is not plugged in. |
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get
ready for DH Travel |
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| We
want to show that we care at D H Airlines and have listened to comments
about or range of literature. We have taken note that people don't only
want to read magazines. From now on, all DH Airlines flights will have a
selection of phonebooks availible to read. The Choice is from the following: BT book 523 Walsall, Cannock and Lichfield BT book 544 Birmingham South East BT book 311 Tayside BT book 318 High Wycombe D H says "enjoy your reading" It is reminded that there is a very limited amount of phone numbers actually possible to ring whilst airbourne |
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say what you think about DH and his airline or just fool around click on the new forum to complain, comment, ask DH a question or make a suggestion. forum the world is not enough for DH Airlines if you've seen the new film "the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy", you'll know all about space travel. Well, DH recently won a contract to fly people to the moon when there is a space port on it. The contract states that the holder will be able to fly flights exclusively from any where in the EU to the moon for the first 10 years of the spaceport's operation. The first flight is schedules for 14th June 2056, that's a Wednesday. Tickets will be available one year before, so note that in your diary now. our no. one pilot wins award for original in flight meals ![]() Those of you who have flown DH before will know that our pilot is the chef and makes the passengers meals that are unrivaled in the skies. he recently won an award for "Europe's worst in flight meals". A party is scheduled later this year at a curry house somewhere on a new cruise ship. We were also pleased with being runner-up in the worst airline category for the third year in a row. special offers There are lots of special offers such as free flights for the under 4s and over 100s and we have lots of European flights from €2.50, however service is not neglected. new aircraft We've also just taken delivery of our latest aircraft - the Airbus A380. It will be named DH Two and has been specially designed for charter and other cheap flights! It seats 600 passengers and can reach speeds of over Mac 0.8. click here to see more info about DH Two our promise our service on all our flights stands out from the rest. our origami trained staff are easily distracted by our customer's passports and are happy to help you survive your flight with us. our planes are equipped with all the latest safety devices and they are even turned on for well over a quarter of the flight. the pilots of these antique planes are just as afraid of the dark as anyone reading this so you can trust them to fly the plane just as they do to you. "i want more DH" COMING SOON! D H Travel - click here Take a sneak preview of D H bid - click here |
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